Forget Beer, It's Time for a Fender Bender

Presidential Elections are the most famous popularity contests in the world.

 

Famously, we like to think we are voting for an Angel, rather than settling for a Devil by the thought exercise, “which candidate would you rather have a beer with?”  (Yes, like a good American grammarian I ended the survey question a preposition with.)

 

Except, we are in extraordinary circumstances:

 

Hundred Year Pandemic

Chronic Systemic Deferred Maintenance

Climate Change Proven beyond a Doubt

Reconciliation of Civil Rights a precipitous necessity

Worst Economic statistics since measurements began from The Great Depression

 

You can see how people might be willing to choose the best devil in such terrible circumstances, rather than the nicest angel.  Whose Executive Administration will be able to handle the massive macroeconomic issues?

 

Almost makes you not even care if you even like the person, so long as you think they may help?

 

So, which Candidate would you rather get into a low speed fender bender with?

 

 

Thought Exercise

 

You are driving your crap auto called US, and the timing belt needs adjustment, tires are worn, and the brakes have been squealing for months, but like most Americans you don’t have an extra $400 to fix them.

 

As you approach an intersection at the speed limit, you anticipate a yellow light ahead and begin your squeaking brakes.  As the light turns, you are a quarter mile from the stop line, and of the two cars ahead of you the car directly in front of you, a new silver Mercedes-Ferrari Electric Hybrid, has stopped about 500 feet away.

 

Your brakes engage, squeak as loud as you have ever heard, and for one reason or another you hit the $456,000 four door sedan that tops off at 155 MPH in 12 seconds.  The bumper, replacement cost your annual salary, after installation, is broken.  Don’t ask for details, it just needs $45,000 worth of work from a 15 MPH fender bender.

 

Out comes (A) either driver, Presidential Candidate (take the test again, and replace with either Major Political Party), and from the shotgun position (B) a Secret Service agent who will witness and back whatever Mr. A says, no matter how awful.

 

Two more facts: 1. They are self-insured, so they have no Insurance, if it is their fault; and 2. Mr. B pressed the emergency oil slick button as they drew to a halt at seven miles per hour—thus it is 100% their fault.  Oil is everywhere, and the Intersection Camera clearly can show the before and after.

 

Which one of these two gentlemen would you then like to encounter in what, without the super tip-top-secret auto, (a) wouldn’t have been an accident, nor (b) be considered potentially your fault and liability? 

 

That is a more accurate measure for where we are today.

 

 

Lest we should consider this the Junior High School election, remember that the Executive of the USA typically administers directly to a force of hundreds of thousands of people, lest the millions directly commanded.  So, which group do you pick... go ahead take the thought exercise a third time, and remember to Vote!